Cowboys & Aprons

From "Listen to Her Rodeo"...Poems of an Alberta Cowboy

by Doug Richards


The days were short, the weather cold

So I didn't see any reason why

I shouldn't stay inside the house

And bake myself a pie.


My first attemp wasn't all that bad

And I know one thinguu's sure true...

I've eaten a whole lot worse and

Paid for the privilege, too!


I might not have bragged so much

Had I known how things would end

But then how was I to know

This was the beginning of a trend.


My neighbour, Erik, phoned one day

Complaining about the snow and winter weather.

He was short of feed, cattle prices were low

And his pie dough wouldnt stick together!


When I tried a piece of his apple pie

I didn't want to admit it at the time.

"His was alot better than mine."

But I had to face up to the truth..

His crust was so tender...and flakey as well.

With the first bite I knew right then

I'd have to take my wounded pride

And go back to the practice pen.


So the challenge was issued

The Gauntlet flung!

Cows went unfed

and Chores undone.



With a lot of practice

Soon we all could bake

Pies just like our Mothers

Often tried to make.


We baked all different kinds.

of each new success we'd boast

And flour dust hung like smoke

Along the Valley of the Ghost!


As the contest raged

Other Ranchers became invovled

So it wasn't very long until

A new Society had evolved.


The women now do all the chores.

Somehow it does seem stange

To see those tough old Ranchers

Workin' a different kind of range


We're now inside where it's warm and dry.

The winter weather holds no fear

As we work around the house...

A phone hanging from our ear.


You should hear the womenfolk

As they complain and twitch

'Cause they're outside and sufferin'

From the woolen underwear itch!


Now at the local functions,

Women gather at the bar... discussing

Agricultural matters - veterinary fees.

While us men sit quietly at a corner table

Sippin' ginger ale and exchanging recipes!









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